Monday, July 26, 2010

babywise...or not

When Luke was a baby, people would ask Keith and I how we were able to get him to sleep through the night at such a young age. Our reply was simple: Babywise. We read the book, loved the idea of having a baby sleep through the night, and faithfully employed the suggested techniques. The whole system worked like a champ. Luke had to CIO (Cry It Out) maybe a handful of times, if that. He really only cried if something was wrong or if he was going through a growth spurt and was actually hungry. He responded beautifully to a schedule (still does) and was really a champion sleeper from the beginning.

With Reagan, I feel Babydumb. The girl will scream and cry for as long as you let her. Instead of calming down, her screaming escalates into an even more high-pitched sadness. Its almost like she's playing a wicked game of chicken; let's see who will blink first, and go figure, I always cave first. Its so hard to hear your baby be so completely upset and honestly, the incessant crying makes my chest ache. Literally.

This past week she slept for seven hours straight two nights in a row. It was nearly miraculous. I thought that maybe we'd finally figured out a manageable system/routine that would work for all of us, but it just wasn't meant to be. She reverted right back to where we were at previously, so we're trying something new tonight.

Reagan is sleeping in her own crib tonight, not in the pack and play at the foot of our bed. Yes, our sweet girl is six months old and still sleeps in our room. In my defense, her room is on the opposite side of the house from us and it's really just nicer to not have to trudge across the house at 2am to figure out why she's woken up this time. I've surrounded her with some of her favorite toys to keep her occupied should she decide to wake up early and she's also learned how to navigate around in her crib and turn on her various crib toys that have light and music.

All I'm really looking for at this point is some kind of routine. I thrive off planning and scheduling and I really just need to know what to expect at this point. The only thing I can expect at this point is dreading going to sleep each night because I never know what I'm in for. We've figured out our daytime routine in the past week or so and it seems to be working really well. If I could just get some consistency out of her night time sleep, I would be a much happier momma. I'm not even asking for a solid 9-12 hours of sleep from her. If she could just have the same sleep schedule each night, no matter what it is, I'd take it.

I love my daughter, but sometimes I think I've been blessed with her so I can see how much more flexible I need to be. I'd like to think though, that maybe she was blessed with me as her momma so she can see the beauty and light in a plan. Sounds like this game of chicken might be a life long game; I just hope I'm not always the one to cave first.


Jill said...

It's funny that you wrote about this because after talking the other night I began thinking about scheduling the kids and their major differences. I was already writing my own blog in my head when I saw yours.

Mattie said...

First off, I wanted to tell you that you don't need to defend the choices that you make. If it worked for you, then don't worry about it. :)

I believe that babies that nurse take longer to "schedule" and sleep through the in point, my son. It took some work, but we did it...13 months later.

Maybe Babywise isn't the right method for miss R? We tried Ferber 3 times and it failed each time. We finally tried The Sleep Lady Shuffle by Kim West. It worked so much better!

Just my $.02.

kristi said...

Hang in there! I sometime feel like I am out of my mind to have three girls in a row. Other days, like you, I feel like there is no greater blessing.